We decided to go to the orphanage for the afternoon visitation today. So at about 1 p.m.ish I hopped in the shower and by 2 we were ready to head to the metro. But just as we were looking around for our apartment keys, the phone rang.
It was Nadya... whose name should really be Jeannie, because she looks like her and she can make anything happen that you need. Lost? Call Jeannie. Can’t read the menu? Call Jeannie. Can’t make the taxi driver understand the word Istanbul? Call Jeannie. Can’t remember where you are supposed to be on Monday at 3:00 pm? Jeannie will call you.
Yes, today was our second SDA appointment. Nothing exciting to report since this was just a formality. Though the SDA officer did ask if we had any more recent photos of Masha she could see and I was happy to show her Masha’s grandma book. Tomorrow at 4 our paperwork for Masha will be ready to pick up, and the next step is to set up court.
Today’s treat...
Monday, August 30, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Updates and Pics
I thought I should post an update about our actual progress here (or rather lack there of).
As you know our SDA appointment was August 19. For those of you not versed in Ukrainian adoptions, that was the formal “referral” appointment where they “show” us the child they are offering us and we agree to go meet them. They draw up papers and the next day they are available for the facilitator to give to the orphanage where the child resides. This is basically legal permission to go visit the child.
At our SDA appointment we learned that we need two appointments because the girls are not sibs. The second appt has not happened yet, nor is it scheduled as far as I know. Also we learned that Masha’s (Mallory’s) paperwork was not correctly done and her mother would need to get some things redone. We have not heard anything about how that is going.
We were able to meet both of the girls and, aside from the day the inspectors were at the orphanage, we can visit them whenever we want (during visiting hours). We are supposed to have a formal sit down with the doctor in each of our girls’ groupa houses. So far neither date has happened. We have tried twice with each but for various reasons it didn’t work out. We will try again on Wednesday the 1st.
Interpol, Interpol, Interpol, please hurry up. Right now Interpol is the hold up. Part of an international adoption requires being cleared by Interpol (yeah, that cool European version of the FBI that you always see in the movies). We cannot go to court without Interpol clearance. We were told that since ours is not ready, court will be set for September 8 in the hopes that it will be here by then. I am hoping for some miracle where it appears on Monday and they squeeze us in this Wed or Thurs.
Ok, so the judge agreed to waive the ten days. Wooo hooo, right? Well the next agency in line will not agree to honor her decision and will wait the ten days out before they will begin their part. OMG, seriously!?! That puts us at the 18th, which is a Saturday, so really we are looking at Monday the 20th to apply for the tax code. The tax code, yup, whatever it is, it takes about 5 days to get... and you need it in order to get the passports.
Monday the 27th we will be able to go for passports and whatever else is left to wrap up. That takes a couple days... Then beautiful Nadya smiles at us and says that this is of course the worst case scenario she has described to us.
Eye on the prize, eyes on the prizes...
Peach’s foot is the size of a newborn’s
Masha was very happy to see mama
She loved the little mirror compact we brought for her
Wish I felt this way about my reflection!
Let’s play telephone...
As you know our SDA appointment was August 19. For those of you not versed in Ukrainian adoptions, that was the formal “referral” appointment where they “show” us the child they are offering us and we agree to go meet them. They draw up papers and the next day they are available for the facilitator to give to the orphanage where the child resides. This is basically legal permission to go visit the child.
At our SDA appointment we learned that we need two appointments because the girls are not sibs. The second appt has not happened yet, nor is it scheduled as far as I know. Also we learned that Masha’s (Mallory’s) paperwork was not correctly done and her mother would need to get some things redone. We have not heard anything about how that is going.
We were able to meet both of the girls and, aside from the day the inspectors were at the orphanage, we can visit them whenever we want (during visiting hours). We are supposed to have a formal sit down with the doctor in each of our girls’ groupa houses. So far neither date has happened. We have tried twice with each but for various reasons it didn’t work out. We will try again on Wednesday the 1st.
Interpol, Interpol, Interpol, please hurry up. Right now Interpol is the hold up. Part of an international adoption requires being cleared by Interpol (yeah, that cool European version of the FBI that you always see in the movies). We cannot go to court without Interpol clearance. We were told that since ours is not ready, court will be set for September 8 in the hopes that it will be here by then. I am hoping for some miracle where it appears on Monday and they squeeze us in this Wed or Thurs.
Ok, so the judge agreed to waive the ten days. Wooo hooo, right? Well the next agency in line will not agree to honor her decision and will wait the ten days out before they will begin their part. OMG, seriously!?! That puts us at the 18th, which is a Saturday, so really we are looking at Monday the 20th to apply for the tax code. The tax code, yup, whatever it is, it takes about 5 days to get... and you need it in order to get the passports.
Monday the 27th we will be able to go for passports and whatever else is left to wrap up. That takes a couple days... Then beautiful Nadya smiles at us and says that this is of course the worst case scenario she has described to us.
Eye on the prize, eyes on the prizes...
Peach’s foot is the size of a newborn’s
Masha was very happy to see mama
She loved the little mirror compact we brought for her
Wish I felt this way about my reflection!
Let’s play telephone...
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Missing My Babies
We’ve been here a little over a week now and this is the longest I have ever been away from my children. Skype just doesn’t cut it. Jade kissed the screen yesterday and told us he wants to hug us. Cue the tears.
I can’t write about them. I want to tell you how they are but I can’t because I choke up when I think about them too much.
How to get around the ache? This is a city of distractions. We have walked so much of it, visited many places and eaten a whole lot of everything. I will share a bit of our therapeutic adventures...
On Saturday we headed off for the churches starting with Saint Sophia’s, the oldest standing church in Kyiv built in the year 1037. We climbed the bell tower and oohed and ahhhed at the views of the city as seen from up there.
There are bells hanging up in there that clearly are no longer used since they have swatches of scarves, and any other handy material, tied to them. I assume people tie these things there for good luck or in prayer. (Did anyone take the guided tour? Did they explain the meaning of the scarves?)
On the grounds of St. Sophia’s there is a carillon. As we approached it there was a family there whose children were testing out the bells. I joined in. They make such a lovely sound. My husband told us he could play a song on them (talented man I have!) and so he warmed up with an attempt at the Star Spangled Banner but quickly switched to Mary Had a Little Lamb. This prompted a screaming fit from a little babushka who was sitting on a nearby bench. Whew, she reamed him out. Moments later a security guard arrived to also give us a talking to (in Ukrainian). Then I noticed the sign... in English... Do Not Touch the Carillon. Ooops. I’ll bet I have the only man in the world who has played a children’s tune on the bells of St. Sophia’s, lol.
From there we headed off to Saint Andrei’s (the church outside the SDA office). It is beautiful inside and we were there for part of a service. My husband and I lit candles and said prayers and it was really moving. Once again though, he found himself in trouble... no video allowed inside the church. I should have prayed that my husband doesn’t end up arrested anytime soon.
Next was Saint Mikhayil’s Cathedral built in 2001. It is stunning. I’ll say it again, stunning.
It is probably the most beautiful church I have ever been in. We saw part of service there too, and I was moved to tears. The entire back wall is made up of ornate goldish metal surrounding saints pictures. There are decorative hanging votives, alters for hundreds of skinny yellow candles, and a lovely wrought iron cupola with a spiral staircase that descends beneath it. No pics allowed. For the most part we behaved and I have only pics taken through the open doorways...
By then we were all starving and we set off in search of true Ukrainian fare. We found a place and bravely headed in. The menu had no descriptions in English and the waitress spoke no English, so we took our chances and ordered a bunch of different things including borsch, varennikis, salads, mushroom soup, veal in a jug, chicken in nut sauce, strudel, and some prune thingie (ack...and I have a picture to prove it but you won’t see that until I post about the odd side of Kiev). Belinda lucked out with the chicken dish, so delicious. The rest of the meal was so-so. It is hard to know if that is how Ukrainian food should taste or if the chef was not the best. (To solve this mystery, we have to continue our eating adventures...)
Catch up notes: In answer to questions received in comments and also follow-ups to other things I told you in previous posts...
1. $17 per 1/2 gallon ice cream isn’t so tasty... probably because no one can afford it and it has been sitting in its packaging since St. Sophia’s was built.
2. There is a 20% tax on everything here, so that was a huge part of our initial shocking grocery bill.
3. We did pick out our apartment and in my Busy Bee post I link to it if you want to see it. Um, it is missing two of its couches and the bean bag chair... wherever will I stick a baby?
4. We have 3 bio kids living at home... Gecko 7 yrs old, Jade turning 4, and Kimani who is two and has Down syndrome. Hubby has other children who are too old to live at home but are just as beautiful and fun as those back at the farm.
5. TGIF’s is overpriced but still has the best mudslides in town :-)
6. Our facilitator and our translator are both awesome. We are lucky to have them, especially our lovely translator who is funny, attentive, and who tells us which is the best beer and cough syrup in town. (Yes, those dang raspberries gave me a cold.)
Picture credit... all the really great pictures were taken by Belinda.
I can’t write about them. I want to tell you how they are but I can’t because I choke up when I think about them too much.
How to get around the ache? This is a city of distractions. We have walked so much of it, visited many places and eaten a whole lot of everything. I will share a bit of our therapeutic adventures...
On Saturday we headed off for the churches starting with Saint Sophia’s, the oldest standing church in Kyiv built in the year 1037. We climbed the bell tower and oohed and ahhhed at the views of the city as seen from up there.
There are bells hanging up in there that clearly are no longer used since they have swatches of scarves, and any other handy material, tied to them. I assume people tie these things there for good luck or in prayer. (Did anyone take the guided tour? Did they explain the meaning of the scarves?)
On the grounds of St. Sophia’s there is a carillon. As we approached it there was a family there whose children were testing out the bells. I joined in. They make such a lovely sound. My husband told us he could play a song on them (talented man I have!) and so he warmed up with an attempt at the Star Spangled Banner but quickly switched to Mary Had a Little Lamb. This prompted a screaming fit from a little babushka who was sitting on a nearby bench. Whew, she reamed him out. Moments later a security guard arrived to also give us a talking to (in Ukrainian). Then I noticed the sign... in English... Do Not Touch the Carillon. Ooops. I’ll bet I have the only man in the world who has played a children’s tune on the bells of St. Sophia’s, lol.
From there we headed off to Saint Andrei’s (the church outside the SDA office). It is beautiful inside and we were there for part of a service. My husband and I lit candles and said prayers and it was really moving. Once again though, he found himself in trouble... no video allowed inside the church. I should have prayed that my husband doesn’t end up arrested anytime soon.
Next was Saint Mikhayil’s Cathedral built in 2001. It is stunning. I’ll say it again, stunning.
It is probably the most beautiful church I have ever been in. We saw part of service there too, and I was moved to tears. The entire back wall is made up of ornate goldish metal surrounding saints pictures. There are decorative hanging votives, alters for hundreds of skinny yellow candles, and a lovely wrought iron cupola with a spiral staircase that descends beneath it. No pics allowed. For the most part we behaved and I have only pics taken through the open doorways...
By then we were all starving and we set off in search of true Ukrainian fare. We found a place and bravely headed in. The menu had no descriptions in English and the waitress spoke no English, so we took our chances and ordered a bunch of different things including borsch, varennikis, salads, mushroom soup, veal in a jug, chicken in nut sauce, strudel, and some prune thingie (ack...and I have a picture to prove it but you won’t see that until I post about the odd side of Kiev). Belinda lucked out with the chicken dish, so delicious. The rest of the meal was so-so. It is hard to know if that is how Ukrainian food should taste or if the chef was not the best. (To solve this mystery, we have to continue our eating adventures...)
Catch up notes: In answer to questions received in comments and also follow-ups to other things I told you in previous posts...
1. $17 per 1/2 gallon ice cream isn’t so tasty... probably because no one can afford it and it has been sitting in its packaging since St. Sophia’s was built.
2. There is a 20% tax on everything here, so that was a huge part of our initial shocking grocery bill.
3. We did pick out our apartment and in my Busy Bee post I link to it if you want to see it. Um, it is missing two of its couches and the bean bag chair... wherever will I stick a baby?
4. We have 3 bio kids living at home... Gecko 7 yrs old, Jade turning 4, and Kimani who is two and has Down syndrome. Hubby has other children who are too old to live at home but are just as beautiful and fun as those back at the farm.
5. TGIF’s is overpriced but still has the best mudslides in town :-)
6. Our facilitator and our translator are both awesome. We are lucky to have them, especially our lovely translator who is funny, attentive, and who tells us which is the best beer and cough syrup in town. (Yes, those dang raspberries gave me a cold.)
Picture credit... all the really great pictures were taken by Belinda.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Beautiful Girls
For months there was just a picture, or two. A split second frozen digitally... that is all we knew of two little girls who waited across the world for us to come for them. I wondered what would they feel like, what would they smell like, what would their voices sound like, their coos, their cries...
Today I found out.
We went to Peach’s house first. When they brought her into the room and I saw her, the tears came. The nurse gave her to me and it felt just like when they place your newborn in your arms. She is tiny but very solid and strong. She held her head up and looked me in the eye with such focus. She is so amazing. I feel privileged that someone would give her to me to keep.
Within minutes she proved to be a daddy’s girl. It was true love as soon as she discovered her papa’s beard. She kept reaching for it, digging into it. Even when he handed her back to me, she looked for him and reached out toward him.
Then she was whisked away and we were escorted out the door. A very short drive later we arrived at the gate of baby house 5.
After a moment of waiting, a troop of children shepherded by ladies on each side came around the side of the building. The leader, a little guy with blondish hair lit up when he saw us. He ran to me and jumped up into my arms... Awww. I gave him hugs and kisses and then put him back on the step. A second later it was Masha’s turn. She gave me a great big smile and let me lift her up. She was laughing and enjoying the attention... until I tried to give her to daddy. At that point she grabbed on to me and refused to be given away or put down.
She tired of me fairly quickly and indicated that she wanted to get down. When I let her go, she ran over the to swingset for a few minutes of swinging. From there she hopped on a stroller tricycle and rode it down the sidewalk to the gate. At the gate she got off the toy and banged on the gate. She said something to me and then said “Vroom vroom”. I told her that yes, soon I would take her away in the car and bring her home.
The lunch cart came and we were told that Masha would follow it because she likes to be first in line. She went to it, peeked under the blanket at the jugs and pots, and then ran back to me. The groupas told her it was lunchtime and called her in but she climbed into a stroller instead. She started strapping herself in so they told us we could take her for a ride in it around the grounds. Next she let herself into the play area and took out a baby doll stroller which she proceeded to push down the walkway. I put her new doll in it and she promptly tossed her out into the grass, lol.
When it was time to leave, there were no goodbyes. A nanny came and swooped Masha up off the sidewalk and took her inside. She started to scream and cry and I could not look back.
There is so much more to tell but I know that it will take me some time to process it all and do it justice. So for now I will leave you with more Peach pictures...
Today I found out.
We went to Peach’s house first. When they brought her into the room and I saw her, the tears came. The nurse gave her to me and it felt just like when they place your newborn in your arms. She is tiny but very solid and strong. She held her head up and looked me in the eye with such focus. She is so amazing. I feel privileged that someone would give her to me to keep.Within minutes she proved to be a daddy’s girl. It was true love as soon as she discovered her papa’s beard. She kept reaching for it, digging into it. Even when he handed her back to me, she looked for him and reached out toward him. Then she was whisked away and we were escorted out the door. A very short drive later we arrived at the gate of baby house 5.
After a moment of waiting, a troop of children shepherded by ladies on each side came around the side of the building. The leader, a little guy with blondish hair lit up when he saw us. He ran to me and jumped up into my arms... Awww. I gave him hugs and kisses and then put him back on the step. A second later it was Masha’s turn. She gave me a great big smile and let me lift her up. She was laughing and enjoying the attention... until I tried to give her to daddy. At that point she grabbed on to me and refused to be given away or put down. She tired of me fairly quickly and indicated that she wanted to get down. When I let her go, she ran over the to swingset for a few minutes of swinging. From there she hopped on a stroller tricycle and rode it down the sidewalk to the gate. At the gate she got off the toy and banged on the gate. She said something to me and then said “Vroom vroom”. I told her that yes, soon I would take her away in the car and bring her home.
The lunch cart came and we were told that Masha would follow it because she likes to be first in line. She went to it, peeked under the blanket at the jugs and pots, and then ran back to me. The groupas told her it was lunchtime and called her in but she climbed into a stroller instead. She started strapping herself in so they told us we could take her for a ride in it around the grounds. Next she let herself into the play area and took out a baby doll stroller which she proceeded to push down the walkway. I put her new doll in it and she promptly tossed her out into the grass, lol.
When it was time to leave, there were no goodbyes. A nanny came and swooped Masha up off the sidewalk and took her inside. She started to scream and cry and I could not look back.
There is so much more to tell but I know that it will take me some time to process it all and do it justice. So for now I will leave you with more Peach pictures...
Thursday, August 19, 2010
The Eagle Has Landed
We began our journey grounded in our home city airport because all air traffic into JFK was halted. This meant that before we even took off, we knew our connection to Amsterdam was blown. The very nice lady at the Delta counter told me that she was putting us on the 9:45 p.m. flight from JFK to Paris on Air France. Ok, that is my favorite airline and flight across the Atlantic ocean. They feed you very yummy food, lots of desserts, and then you drift off to sleep to the sound of pilots and stewardesses speaking the prettiest language in the world.
But what is a trip to France without a dog? As we settled in on the night flight, a tall dark woman began loudly exclaiming in French that she hates dogs (she must be some version of fake French) and will not sit next to the woman who has her neighbor seat. Believe it or not, the lady with the Pug was American and had no idea what Ms. Mad was saying. Three airline personnel were trying to soothe the situation to no avail. I spotted my chance to snag a window seat and my husband said he did not mind at all being stuck next to Ms. Mad because he doesn’t understand french either. So I switched places... I got the window, dog lady took the aisle, and Ms. Mad spent the flight snuggled up to my husband a few rows back. The Pug was a service dog and behaved herself the whole flight.
An hour after landing in France we were on our way to Kiev, in business class thanks to the Delta representative in JFK who took a fancy to my hubby. This meant extra chocolates and cookies. When we landed in Kiev we hopped into a metro type bus that was about 150 degrees inside and rode over to the airport building. It took about ten minutes in line to get our passports stamped and move to baggage where we waited hopefully for quite some time. Once the belt stopped, we quickly headed to Lost Baggage. The line was already forming... and it takes a while to fill out all the papers. Suddenly Ms. Fake Blond #312 butts ahead of everyone and steps right up to the counter. Her audacity was stunning and the guy in front of me who had been next in line seemed just about as pissed as I was but no one said anything.
We finally completed our missing baggage paperwork and were shipped off to customs, the red line for those who have things to declare. I had been told by other Americans to just do the green line and keep walking, but with bags to follow after and without me, I thought it best to be prudent and declare the 19k we were carrying as well as the gifts that were in our missing bags. It took all of five minutes and cost us nothing. Oleg and Nadya were waiting for us outside and took us right to our apartment. Then they brought us to TGIF’s and dropped us on another family with instructions to them to show us “everything”.
They were tired and had already eaten but were gracious enough to sit with us while we ate dinner and afterward to walk us to a money changing place where we could also buy some foodstuffs. Then we were alone, off to our apartment to settle in.
(I hope I am not boring you to death, this being the longest blog post I have ever written...)
Our apartment is spacious and clean, and really quite nice. There were a couple of little things we needed to mention and ask for, but all in all, it is great here. We face the back of the building so it is quiet and the views into the windows below can be rather interesting... No description here because this is a family blog and what we saw most people have to pay to see, lol.
We slept until 2 p.m. the next day, which is 7 a.m. at home so I didn’t feel too bad about this excess. Once up, we were off to do some real grocery shopping. On the way to Mandarin Plaza we came upon some little old ladies selling raspberries in plastic cups. I wanted to buy some but my husband talked me into waiting. Then he went on to try to convince me that eating fruit that came from who-knows-where would make me sick. At the grocery store we bought some basics and it came to a whopping 1254 UAH. That is about $150. Oops. On the way home I inspected the receipt to try to figure out what the two items that totalled about $50 together were... and I really had no idea.
The raspberry ladies were still outside our apartment so I bought a cupful, and then gave 2 UAH to the disabled old lady sitting near them who was begging. She gave me a gold toothed grin in return and what I hope was a blessing in Ukrainian. The raspberries were delicious and so far I have not suffered any negative consequences from eating them.
During our second trip to the grocery store for more milk and water, I figured out that the cheese grater I bought and the chocolate ice cream my husband chose were the culprits. We will be avoiding the $17 per gallon ice cream from now on and thankfully my lovely $33 cheese grater will last a lifetime.
On the evening of the 18th, our bags arrived safely to our apartment. Everything made it just fine except for a tiny bottle of perfume that someone in TSA must have stolen. They left its wrapper. Weird. I unpacked and now it really feels comfortable here, especially since I brought my home-made latte supplies and made us each a yummy drink while we fussed with the Internet connections, Skype, phones, etc.
Today at 2 p.m. was our appointment with the SDA (State Department of Adoptions) and Nadya offered to meet us early around 1 p.m. to take us around a bit. We left the apartment much earlier to set off in search of men’s white cotton socks because somebody, ah hem, forgot to put his socks in the “To Pack” pile. We are in the heart of Kiev and in many ways it reminds me of NYC. Billboards with beautiful, glitzy models everywhere... expensive shops non-stop... Tiffany, Polo, Ferrari (goodies, not the actual cars for sale), Chanel, etc. There is no Walmart here folks, and no equivalent that we found. We walked many streets poking our heads into many doors and many times I lifted my husband’s pantleg and pointed to his sock... No socks... well we found $25 dress socks but no cheapo ordinary guy socks. We gave up and headed to TGIF’s to meet Nadya.
On the way, we saw a very long cream colored stretch limo, with balloons tied to it and a man holding the biggest, by far, bouquet of roses we have ever seen. Wow hubbies, these Ukrainian guys just raised the bar on you, big time.
Nadya walked us down a very busy famous street, Kreshchatyk which goes past several touristy type sites and a huge underground mall (socks maybe?). Beyond that we started up a long hill and went into a park with more up and down winding around with great views of the other side of the city. Then more brick stairs in the side of the steepest hill... up up up. Nadya asked me if I was tired. Yes, not exactly dead yet, but a bit sweaty and out of breath. She laughed and said that she thought it was ok to take us this way because I look skinny and in shape, ha ha ha. Luckily at the very top there is a stand that sells ice water.
Outside of the SDA there are many street vendors who are selling mainly matryoshkas. Nadya introduced us to her friend that she says will give us a good deal and I plan to go back when we have time to browse. We did see one of Obama with guess who inside? Clinton and every other democrat down to Kennedy. I cracked up. No Bush and company though. The church outside the SDA is beautiful and we will go back tomorrow to explore it.
(Need a potty break yet? Go ahead, I’ll still be here when you get back.)
Finally, the appointment... the formal referral of our girls. A guard lets us in and we are called upstairs by a pretty, dark haired woman. (Lots of pretty girls here, very dressed up, sexy high heels... poor hubby has whiplash already.) We sit down and the woman begins talking to Nadya in a tone that says something is wrong. I recognize only Peach’s last name. Nadya tries to talk her into or out of something but no dice.
Two children who are not siblings require two separate SDA appointments and Oleg will have to file more papers on our behalf for Mallory on Wednesday. Because Tuesday the 24th is the biggest holiday here and no one works Monday or Tuesday at SDA. The woman drops a stack of papers on the table and on top I see...
My beautiful Peach. They tell me what I already know and a little bit more... that her mother was a single mother and there are no siblings. Our referral for her will be ready tomorrow afternoon which means we can visit her on Saturday, if the social workers have not taken the day off for the holiday, or then on Monday unless they have also taken that day, in which case it will be Wednesday. Pitocin anybody?
Then begins a conversation about Mallory and again I can tell something is wrong that Nadya cannot fix with just her sweetness. Another stack of papers in dropped in front of us. This time there are two sides...
A very sad, unhappy baby with gorgeous blue eyes...
who turns into the cutest thing ever!
Mallory’s mother had the notary who wrote up her papers say that she could only be adopted by foreign parents. Ok, we are, that works.... but no it doesn’t because that is illegal here and now they must track down mom and have new papers written up. Seriously? For the first time since we embarked on this journey to Kiev I begin to feel a bit nervous. What if they can’t find her? Grandma can do it for her... remember grandma? Thank goodness for grandma. There is also no new info about Mallory other than she also has no siblings.
After the appointment we part ways with Nadya who has copies to make of some pages of our dossier. We head back down toward home and snap some fun photos on the way... like of the dog hangout where I thought they were all dead at first but then one moved. They were ownerless, possibly homeless. There seem to be a lot of strays roaming around this city.
The gate I would love to have to my backyard...
Another shot of the church we will visit tomorrow...
On our travels home we stopped at the mall and after about 25 stores, we finally found some cheapo white cotton socks for men, 5 pairs for $7, yay! Once we got in the apartment, we were too tired to cook so we munched on fresh bread and cheese.
Tomorrow at 9:10 a.m. one of my best friends arrives in Kiev. She will stay with us for a week. I can’t wait to see her since she lives in Florida now and I only get to see her a couple times a year when she flies north. And, she is a photographer... so hopefully my picture quality will improve!
We are all caught up now, you and I. So for tonight, it’s “A bientot,” or something like that ;-)
But what is a trip to France without a dog? As we settled in on the night flight, a tall dark woman began loudly exclaiming in French that she hates dogs (she must be some version of fake French) and will not sit next to the woman who has her neighbor seat. Believe it or not, the lady with the Pug was American and had no idea what Ms. Mad was saying. Three airline personnel were trying to soothe the situation to no avail. I spotted my chance to snag a window seat and my husband said he did not mind at all being stuck next to Ms. Mad because he doesn’t understand french either. So I switched places... I got the window, dog lady took the aisle, and Ms. Mad spent the flight snuggled up to my husband a few rows back. The Pug was a service dog and behaved herself the whole flight.
An hour after landing in France we were on our way to Kiev, in business class thanks to the Delta representative in JFK who took a fancy to my hubby. This meant extra chocolates and cookies. When we landed in Kiev we hopped into a metro type bus that was about 150 degrees inside and rode over to the airport building. It took about ten minutes in line to get our passports stamped and move to baggage where we waited hopefully for quite some time. Once the belt stopped, we quickly headed to Lost Baggage. The line was already forming... and it takes a while to fill out all the papers. Suddenly Ms. Fake Blond #312 butts ahead of everyone and steps right up to the counter. Her audacity was stunning and the guy in front of me who had been next in line seemed just about as pissed as I was but no one said anything.
We finally completed our missing baggage paperwork and were shipped off to customs, the red line for those who have things to declare. I had been told by other Americans to just do the green line and keep walking, but with bags to follow after and without me, I thought it best to be prudent and declare the 19k we were carrying as well as the gifts that were in our missing bags. It took all of five minutes and cost us nothing. Oleg and Nadya were waiting for us outside and took us right to our apartment. Then they brought us to TGIF’s and dropped us on another family with instructions to them to show us “everything”.
They were tired and had already eaten but were gracious enough to sit with us while we ate dinner and afterward to walk us to a money changing place where we could also buy some foodstuffs. Then we were alone, off to our apartment to settle in.
(I hope I am not boring you to death, this being the longest blog post I have ever written...)
Our apartment is spacious and clean, and really quite nice. There were a couple of little things we needed to mention and ask for, but all in all, it is great here. We face the back of the building so it is quiet and the views into the windows below can be rather interesting... No description here because this is a family blog and what we saw most people have to pay to see, lol.
We slept until 2 p.m. the next day, which is 7 a.m. at home so I didn’t feel too bad about this excess. Once up, we were off to do some real grocery shopping. On the way to Mandarin Plaza we came upon some little old ladies selling raspberries in plastic cups. I wanted to buy some but my husband talked me into waiting. Then he went on to try to convince me that eating fruit that came from who-knows-where would make me sick. At the grocery store we bought some basics and it came to a whopping 1254 UAH. That is about $150. Oops. On the way home I inspected the receipt to try to figure out what the two items that totalled about $50 together were... and I really had no idea.
The raspberry ladies were still outside our apartment so I bought a cupful, and then gave 2 UAH to the disabled old lady sitting near them who was begging. She gave me a gold toothed grin in return and what I hope was a blessing in Ukrainian. The raspberries were delicious and so far I have not suffered any negative consequences from eating them.
During our second trip to the grocery store for more milk and water, I figured out that the cheese grater I bought and the chocolate ice cream my husband chose were the culprits. We will be avoiding the $17 per gallon ice cream from now on and thankfully my lovely $33 cheese grater will last a lifetime.
On the evening of the 18th, our bags arrived safely to our apartment. Everything made it just fine except for a tiny bottle of perfume that someone in TSA must have stolen. They left its wrapper. Weird. I unpacked and now it really feels comfortable here, especially since I brought my home-made latte supplies and made us each a yummy drink while we fussed with the Internet connections, Skype, phones, etc.
Today at 2 p.m. was our appointment with the SDA (State Department of Adoptions) and Nadya offered to meet us early around 1 p.m. to take us around a bit. We left the apartment much earlier to set off in search of men’s white cotton socks because somebody, ah hem, forgot to put his socks in the “To Pack” pile. We are in the heart of Kiev and in many ways it reminds me of NYC. Billboards with beautiful, glitzy models everywhere... expensive shops non-stop... Tiffany, Polo, Ferrari (goodies, not the actual cars for sale), Chanel, etc. There is no Walmart here folks, and no equivalent that we found. We walked many streets poking our heads into many doors and many times I lifted my husband’s pantleg and pointed to his sock... No socks... well we found $25 dress socks but no cheapo ordinary guy socks. We gave up and headed to TGIF’s to meet Nadya.
On the way, we saw a very long cream colored stretch limo, with balloons tied to it and a man holding the biggest, by far, bouquet of roses we have ever seen. Wow hubbies, these Ukrainian guys just raised the bar on you, big time.
Nadya walked us down a very busy famous street, Kreshchatyk which goes past several touristy type sites and a huge underground mall (socks maybe?). Beyond that we started up a long hill and went into a park with more up and down winding around with great views of the other side of the city. Then more brick stairs in the side of the steepest hill... up up up. Nadya asked me if I was tired. Yes, not exactly dead yet, but a bit sweaty and out of breath. She laughed and said that she thought it was ok to take us this way because I look skinny and in shape, ha ha ha. Luckily at the very top there is a stand that sells ice water.
Outside of the SDA there are many street vendors who are selling mainly matryoshkas. Nadya introduced us to her friend that she says will give us a good deal and I plan to go back when we have time to browse. We did see one of Obama with guess who inside? Clinton and every other democrat down to Kennedy. I cracked up. No Bush and company though. The church outside the SDA is beautiful and we will go back tomorrow to explore it.
(Need a potty break yet? Go ahead, I’ll still be here when you get back.)
Finally, the appointment... the formal referral of our girls. A guard lets us in and we are called upstairs by a pretty, dark haired woman. (Lots of pretty girls here, very dressed up, sexy high heels... poor hubby has whiplash already.) We sit down and the woman begins talking to Nadya in a tone that says something is wrong. I recognize only Peach’s last name. Nadya tries to talk her into or out of something but no dice.
Two children who are not siblings require two separate SDA appointments and Oleg will have to file more papers on our behalf for Mallory on Wednesday. Because Tuesday the 24th is the biggest holiday here and no one works Monday or Tuesday at SDA. The woman drops a stack of papers on the table and on top I see...
My beautiful Peach. They tell me what I already know and a little bit more... that her mother was a single mother and there are no siblings. Our referral for her will be ready tomorrow afternoon which means we can visit her on Saturday, if the social workers have not taken the day off for the holiday, or then on Monday unless they have also taken that day, in which case it will be Wednesday. Pitocin anybody?
Then begins a conversation about Mallory and again I can tell something is wrong that Nadya cannot fix with just her sweetness. Another stack of papers in dropped in front of us. This time there are two sides...
A very sad, unhappy baby with gorgeous blue eyes...
who turns into the cutest thing ever!
Mallory’s mother had the notary who wrote up her papers say that she could only be adopted by foreign parents. Ok, we are, that works.... but no it doesn’t because that is illegal here and now they must track down mom and have new papers written up. Seriously? For the first time since we embarked on this journey to Kiev I begin to feel a bit nervous. What if they can’t find her? Grandma can do it for her... remember grandma? Thank goodness for grandma. There is also no new info about Mallory other than she also has no siblings.
After the appointment we part ways with Nadya who has copies to make of some pages of our dossier. We head back down toward home and snap some fun photos on the way... like of the dog hangout where I thought they were all dead at first but then one moved. They were ownerless, possibly homeless. There seem to be a lot of strays roaming around this city.
The gate I would love to have to my backyard...
Another shot of the church we will visit tomorrow...
On our travels home we stopped at the mall and after about 25 stores, we finally found some cheapo white cotton socks for men, 5 pairs for $7, yay! Once we got in the apartment, we were too tired to cook so we munched on fresh bread and cheese.
Tomorrow at 9:10 a.m. one of my best friends arrives in Kiev. She will stay with us for a week. I can’t wait to see her since she lives in Florida now and I only get to see her a couple times a year when she flies north. And, she is a photographer... so hopefully my picture quality will improve!
We are all caught up now, you and I. So for tonight, it’s “A bientot,” or something like that ;-)
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Busy Bee
Remember that list of todos that was in my head? Well, most of it is done! It has been a crazy couple of days...
The money snafu... take note, it takes 3-5 business days to move cash money from anywhere to anywhere, unless of course you can wire it, which RR can’t. Western Union, Paypal, you name it... 3 to 5 days. So for a little while it was a bit of a panic trying to figure out how to get my bank to give me 18k in pretty 100 dollar bills that I did not have sitting in our account. Thanks to my cousin and her husband who loaned us 10k in cash, it all worked out ok. But lesson learned, don’t expect to get your money in 3 days. And on top of that, the nice bank manager picked through every 100 dollar bill in the vault to get clean ones because it takes 5-10 business days to get brand new bills.
Plane tickets all set... home city to JFK to Amsterdam to Kiev. Leave at 1:00 on Monday the 16th, arrive at 4:50 Tuesday the 17th, with a seven hour time difference. Got a great price through RR’s friendly travel agent who got us the humanitarian rate on Delta.
Apartment rented. Wanna see it? Ignore the price, they gave us an AMAZING rate break because we are in Kiev the whole time and are renting it for 5 weeks. Read the apartment description, it is hilarious.
Power of attorney doc, medical proxies... all set. Boy does it ever help to have an attorney for a friend who is also your next-door neighbor!
Packing... just about done and it all fit :-) Thanks to my packing police friends who have already done this trip and clued me in to what is easily available over there.
Babysitters... MIL on her way to NY right now. My mom is also packing up and coming tomorrow.
Electronics... Skype, cameras, etc all set thanks to my techno hubby.
And, we were blessed yesterday by a visit from Sandie the missionary who was at our orphanage in June of this year. She brought pictures, video, maps, and lots of info and advice. She drove up from PA and we had a great time together. She brought her daughter Jillian who had a wonderful time with my boys.
I wish I had time to write to everyone of you who has emailed me, commented on the blogs, left kind words on FB... I am so encouraged by your love and support. You have kept my spirits up and my nerves in check.
Gotta run... there are still a bunch of things around the house to wrap up, and some little ones that need mama’s full attention today. I’ll be posting again as soon as I can.
The money snafu... take note, it takes 3-5 business days to move cash money from anywhere to anywhere, unless of course you can wire it, which RR can’t. Western Union, Paypal, you name it... 3 to 5 days. So for a little while it was a bit of a panic trying to figure out how to get my bank to give me 18k in pretty 100 dollar bills that I did not have sitting in our account. Thanks to my cousin and her husband who loaned us 10k in cash, it all worked out ok. But lesson learned, don’t expect to get your money in 3 days. And on top of that, the nice bank manager picked through every 100 dollar bill in the vault to get clean ones because it takes 5-10 business days to get brand new bills.
Plane tickets all set... home city to JFK to Amsterdam to Kiev. Leave at 1:00 on Monday the 16th, arrive at 4:50 Tuesday the 17th, with a seven hour time difference. Got a great price through RR’s friendly travel agent who got us the humanitarian rate on Delta.
Apartment rented. Wanna see it? Ignore the price, they gave us an AMAZING rate break because we are in Kiev the whole time and are renting it for 5 weeks. Read the apartment description, it is hilarious.
Power of attorney doc, medical proxies... all set. Boy does it ever help to have an attorney for a friend who is also your next-door neighbor!
Packing... just about done and it all fit :-) Thanks to my packing police friends who have already done this trip and clued me in to what is easily available over there.
Babysitters... MIL on her way to NY right now. My mom is also packing up and coming tomorrow.
Electronics... Skype, cameras, etc all set thanks to my techno hubby.
And, we were blessed yesterday by a visit from Sandie the missionary who was at our orphanage in June of this year. She brought pictures, video, maps, and lots of info and advice. She drove up from PA and we had a great time together. She brought her daughter Jillian who had a wonderful time with my boys.
I wish I had time to write to everyone of you who has emailed me, commented on the blogs, left kind words on FB... I am so encouraged by your love and support. You have kept my spirits up and my nerves in check.
Gotta run... there are still a bunch of things around the house to wrap up, and some little ones that need mama’s full attention today. I’ll be posting again as soon as I can.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
OMG, PTL
We have a travel date.
I have been checking everyday, three or four times a day until it gets too late over there to be writing emails... and nothing. It is like that last two weeks of pregnancy when you just can’t wait. Your skin itches, you can’t sleep, you are constantly thinking about the baby (or in this case babies).
I am not good at indefinite waiting... it makes me a slacker. I need a deadline to function in high gear... so that big long list of things we have been meaning to do for the past month is still just a list, not even a list on paper, just a list in my brain.
But this morning everything changed. High gear here we come!
August 19th we have a date with the SDA. That is not a typo. Next Thursday, next week we will be in Kiev starting the formal process of becoming Mallory and Peach’s parents.
Woo hoo... happy dance, happy dance.
I have been checking everyday, three or four times a day until it gets too late over there to be writing emails... and nothing. It is like that last two weeks of pregnancy when you just can’t wait. Your skin itches, you can’t sleep, you are constantly thinking about the baby (or in this case babies).
I am not good at indefinite waiting... it makes me a slacker. I need a deadline to function in high gear... so that big long list of things we have been meaning to do for the past month is still just a list, not even a list on paper, just a list in my brain.
But this morning everything changed. High gear here we come!
August 19th we have a date with the SDA. That is not a typo. Next Thursday, next week we will be in Kiev starting the formal process of becoming Mallory and Peach’s parents.
Woo hoo... happy dance, happy dance.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Peach’s Grandma Book
Peach’s Grandma Book is finished. Scrapbooking is such a good de-stress mechanism for me. Doing this book was enjoyable because it was a small well-defined project. I really hope this book (and Mallory’s) gives the grandparents a sense of peace and hope for their grandbabies.
Peach’s book is also an 8” by 8” scrapbook. The lavender album is Creative Memories and it was given to me by the March of Dimes people that hosted a scrap night every Tuesday evening when my daughter Kimani was living in the NICU. Most of the book is identical to Mallory’s so I will only post the pages that are unique. And of course, the smears are just me smudging out personal info so that I could post these pics on the Internet.
Renaissance
The top part has her real Russian name and birth date. The bottom section has her American name and her adopted on date (the actual date will be hand-written in once it happens.)
Our Girl
The words say, “Precious girl”
Waiting
It says, “Waiting for Peach”
Mallory
It has Mallory’s American name, date of birth, and also says “adopted with Peach”.
Promise Letter
The letter says that we will always love Peach, that she will have a good life with us, and that we will teach her about her grandparents and tell her they love her.
Peach’s book is also an 8” by 8” scrapbook. The lavender album is Creative Memories and it was given to me by the March of Dimes people that hosted a scrap night every Tuesday evening when my daughter Kimani was living in the NICU. Most of the book is identical to Mallory’s so I will only post the pages that are unique. And of course, the smears are just me smudging out personal info so that I could post these pics on the Internet.
Renaissance
The top part has her real Russian name and birth date. The bottom section has her American name and her adopted on date (the actual date will be hand-written in once it happens.)
Our Girl
The words say, “Precious girl”
Waiting
It says, “Waiting for Peach”
Mallory
It has Mallory’s American name, date of birth, and also says “adopted with Peach”.
Promise Letter
The letter says that we will always love Peach, that she will have a good life with us, and that we will teach her about her grandparents and tell her they love her.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Anxiety Attack
Last night I was sitting on the couch with my husband, watching a goofy movie he got from the library, when it hit me... I am getting two new children in my life. You already know this... I already know this. But last night it hit me and my stomach tied in knots.
I sat there and had a full blown anxiety attack. My nerves went wild, my brain started making unwanted announcements...
“You have to leave your kids for five weeks and you still are not sure who will care for them while you are gone.”
“You have to fly to JFK and then to the far side of Europe, crossing the wide Atlantic ocean on the way... yeah, that is about four hours of flying over the deep water, nothing but water, nowhere to make an emergency landing.”
“You have to hide $18,000 in new hundred dollar bills in your bra, but don’t forget to declare it or they might confiscate it.”
“Last time I checked you only could say 5 words in Russian... Remember how hard it was to be in France? Huh? And your French was pretty good. You are going to be confused non-stop and everybody is going to know you are a “tourist” and you will probably get robbed.”
“Your internet connection isn’t going to work right because of some firewall that you can’t figure out how to get around. You will not be able to Skype with your family back home.”
“You are going to meet two little girls who might not even like you. They might be afraid of you. They might cry when you try to hold them.”
“While you are away, school will start and your son will get in all sorts of trouble because he is stressed out. He will get kicked off the school bus and grandma will be freaking out.”
“While you are away, your baby girl will sign for you and she will not understand why you don’t come back.”
“Someone is going to hand you two human beings for you to keep, forever.”
“You have to drag them back across that great big ocean... hours and hours on planes and in airports. And, they don’t understand a word you are saying. You are probably going to feed them something new that doesn’t agree with them and they will have diarrhea the whole time. Everybody on the plane will hate you because you can’t get your kids to stop crying.”
“You are going to finally get home and the three kids you left there are all going to be very angry with you, and jealous, and you are going to be too exhausted to do anything about it.”
Shut up already! Everything you just said is worth it to save their lives. They are going to be sent to a horrible place, left all day and night in cribs, starving and soiled. With no stimulation, they will pull their hair out and bite themselves to feel. They will cry and no one will come to comfort them... eventually they will never cry again. Within a couple years they will be nothing but skin and bones and one day their lonely little bodies will simply quit.
So stop trying to scare me... everything is going to be fine, just fine. I can do this. The butterflies in my stomach settle down a bit... Yes, someone is going to hand me two tiny human beings to keep, and their lives are going to change forever.
I sat there and had a full blown anxiety attack. My nerves went wild, my brain started making unwanted announcements...
“You have to leave your kids for five weeks and you still are not sure who will care for them while you are gone.”
“You have to fly to JFK and then to the far side of Europe, crossing the wide Atlantic ocean on the way... yeah, that is about four hours of flying over the deep water, nothing but water, nowhere to make an emergency landing.”
“You have to hide $18,000 in new hundred dollar bills in your bra, but don’t forget to declare it or they might confiscate it.”
“Last time I checked you only could say 5 words in Russian... Remember how hard it was to be in France? Huh? And your French was pretty good. You are going to be confused non-stop and everybody is going to know you are a “tourist” and you will probably get robbed.”
“Your internet connection isn’t going to work right because of some firewall that you can’t figure out how to get around. You will not be able to Skype with your family back home.”
“You are going to meet two little girls who might not even like you. They might be afraid of you. They might cry when you try to hold them.”
“While you are away, school will start and your son will get in all sorts of trouble because he is stressed out. He will get kicked off the school bus and grandma will be freaking out.”
“While you are away, your baby girl will sign for you and she will not understand why you don’t come back.”
“Someone is going to hand you two human beings for you to keep, forever.”
“You have to drag them back across that great big ocean... hours and hours on planes and in airports. And, they don’t understand a word you are saying. You are probably going to feed them something new that doesn’t agree with them and they will have diarrhea the whole time. Everybody on the plane will hate you because you can’t get your kids to stop crying.”
“You are going to finally get home and the three kids you left there are all going to be very angry with you, and jealous, and you are going to be too exhausted to do anything about it.”
Shut up already! Everything you just said is worth it to save their lives. They are going to be sent to a horrible place, left all day and night in cribs, starving and soiled. With no stimulation, they will pull their hair out and bite themselves to feel. They will cry and no one will come to comfort them... eventually they will never cry again. Within a couple years they will be nothing but skin and bones and one day their lonely little bodies will simply quit.
So stop trying to scare me... everything is going to be fine, just fine. I can do this. The butterflies in my stomach settle down a bit... Yes, someone is going to hand me two tiny human beings to keep, and their lives are going to change forever.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
If Only...
Toward the beginning of this blog, I told you that we were actually going to adopt a baby from a different country in Eastern Europe. Her name was Arina. She disappeared from the database and from our grasp. I still have this picture of her framed and resting on my dresser to remind me of the first orphan baby who won my heart.
While we were working on getting her, another little girl in her same orphanage caught our eye, and we had hoped to be able to take her too. She is a beauty, and she is nearing her date to be sent to the institution for the rest of her life. Next Spring, when our precious Mallory is celebrating her 4th birthday with cake, and presents, and lots of people to shower her with love, Anastasiya will be heading off to a place worse than where we imprison our most heinous criminals.
Anastasiya as a baby...
Anastasiya is waiting for a mommy...
Is Anastasiya waiting for you?
Her pretty little face haunts me. If only, I think with sorrow... if only we could have saved her too.
If you have room in your home, and in your heart, please consider adopting Anastasiya.
While we were working on getting her, another little girl in her same orphanage caught our eye, and we had hoped to be able to take her too. She is a beauty, and she is nearing her date to be sent to the institution for the rest of her life. Next Spring, when our precious Mallory is celebrating her 4th birthday with cake, and presents, and lots of people to shower her with love, Anastasiya will be heading off to a place worse than where we imprison our most heinous criminals.
Anastasiya as a baby...
Anastasiya is waiting for a mommy...
Is Anastasiya waiting for you?
Her pretty little face haunts me. If only, I think with sorrow... if only we could have saved her too.
If you have room in your home, and in your heart, please consider adopting Anastasiya.
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